LMAO!!! this owl looks fake! is t real??via us.st12.yimg.com
I love owls. They always look like they’re about to lose their shit and fuck you up.
Martha’s quick tips on fingering:
- Cut your nails. It is definitely possible to scratch up the inside of a vagina. Don’t do it.
- Google the location of the g-spot. You don’t know where it is. Shut up, you don’t.
- That’s pretty much it.
Pay attention to the clitoris! That is important, too!!!!!!
As some of you know, I have a bad habit of telling people to suck my dick.
Whenever I say this to girls, the response is usually “Eww, Martha, that’s so gross.”
Whenever I say this to guys, the responses range from opening their mouths to offering to play catcher if I ever want to put it anywhere else.
This is why most of my friends are boys.
I think that I am the exception to this, Martha… seeing as how I have told you to “suck my dick” myself ^_^
Remember when your kid really wanted a Tickle Me Elmo for Christmas, but all the stores were sold out so you went to China Town and got them a Giggle-Time ALL-Mo?
Bounce- Timbaland feat. Dr. Dre, Missy Elliot, and Justin Timberlake
This song will destroy me. My poor skeletal system and internal organs…
This song makes me wanna fucking dance!… and by that I mean fuck and dance.
Not gonna lie, Martha… I had some hot sex to this song! ^_^ YAY FOR DIRTY SEX! :-)
17thsuitcase:johnnyfive:misterdan:cameronchristopher:blakewhitman:
someone with a beautiful imagination made this.
